torment

The whispering was all around her, or was it only in her head? On the gray days like today it was so hard to tell. Too old, too short, too fat, too something whatever it was, it just wasn’t right. It was the whispers of not good enough. She tried to drown them out with louder music, or reading, or tv but they kept on, through out the day. One pill and then another, trying to make them stop but they would not.
No happy ending here, just the torment started so long ago. The adolescent whispers, the teenage angst, and then as time went by secrecy, those things that nobody could know, should know, if they only knew, then they would see how awful she really was so the secrets stayed buried. Buried, until the demons pulled them out one by one to torment her throughout the day while the rain kept falling. As the lightening flashed and the thunder cracked and the grayness turned to night she knew there would be no rainbow at the end of this storm. Take one pill and then another to try to stop it but it only made everything else blurry and the sound of the whispers rattled louder and louder in her head. To bed to sleep, ah sleep, sweet sleep would be a rescue but instead it was tossing and turning and nightmares and then finally silence. She prayed for new mercies in the morning and with the dawning of the new day an end to the demon's whispering.